Come join me on the couch and explore
ways of thinking and feeling.
ways of thinking and feeling.
For many people I know it has been a massive 6 months in so many good ways. The challenges are asking us to look at our values and beliefs and who/what we really want to be known for. The world events, in the social, economic and natural disasters are asking us as individuals and collectively to get real. Get clear and stand up as to what we as individuals and in our society we want to stand for. What is important to us and where we want to be in the future.
The bottom line is if we don't check in with who we truly want to be and act from this place, we will be drifting down a path to a place we may not want to be in a few years time. Do you want to be the frog in hot water, slowly adapting to hot water, or do you want to the be one in charge of the amount of heat in your own bath water? This applies to all aspects of life... health, lifestyle, relationships, career etc. The same principles apply as you are working on your own core self and the ripple effect spreads through your life.
Coming home after my mid life, European adventure I had to claim my place in my reality. Sure, I had read, attended coursed and explored thoughts and ways of reality hacking. I have create all the good, and ugly and inbetweens to date, but I also knew that if i didn't take more control over my thoughts, desires and actions from the past and come to peace with them I was going to keep living a limited, scary life. So, what can be done, without leaving the country to contemplate your hidden parts that want to come forth?
Take on the mode of a research scientist - 'let's investigate a thought and prove it either way.'
We all have ideas, beliefs and values; at some time in our life it is invaluable to consider whose they really belong to. If we blindly stay on auto-pilot, it is quite possible we are going to live someone else's destiny and following the wrong flight plan.
How does this happen? It is quite simple really. We inherit our genes from parents. Nothing new here. What is a newer consideration is our Grandmother makes the female portion of us. How? Our mother's eggs are made by her mother, our Grandmothers. Sit with this thought for a bit. What was our Grandparents' life really like? What were the ideologies, beliefs and values of the time; access to resource, wisdoms experiences etc.? Consider where and how these embedded beliefs are playing out in your thoughts now. This is a real example of Auto-pilot. How about your parents? Not only what happened in their home and social experiences, but what were their actual interpretations of life around your conception, and through your childhood.
Anyone can embed ideas into our thinking, if we allow it. Impressions from parents, school, peers, work, colleagues, society, culture etc., all have the power to change our deepest held values, especially in hurtful, stressful situations.
Consider too, from a sociological view, each generation has a theme, baby boomers, free love, techno etc. The era in which we were exposed to also creates a view of what life could, should, might be like. Naturally, there is an opposite side to all of these things.
Self care, for me, personally goes way beyond looking after body or treating myself. These actions really do feel good and are important, but the deeper level of self care for me is about knowing myself and clearly stating who I are and what I believe. The more attention I have given to sifting through my own beliefs, ideologies etc the easier it has been to like and love myself, and therefore less need from others affection or attention to make myself feel good.
There was a time in my life when I figured I either had to get real or get out. Show up or go home, whatever catchphrase you want to use. I had, unknowingly taken on a lot of negative, self abating thoughts from quite a few people. The result was I didn't like, let alone love myself, and I really didn't like who I was. I didn't know how to let people in, and really felt that unimportant.
Fortunately, psychology is starting to talk about the idea that "Until we know ourselves and accept ourselves, know what works for us in a good way we are inclined to go with the flow, allow others do things that we would rather not do, and tend to seek the fillers to the gaps we have in ourselves." When we know what our own gaps are, and learn to fill them ourselves, we become more empowered. It is easier to say no and mean it, set healthy boundaries and not feel the need to engage in questionable or dangerous behaviour to fit in. We basically look after ourselves and engage with others in healthier, truer ways. Am I there yet? No but I am certainly further down the line that I was.
How is it possible to create this clarity? Start studying the greats, look at all things you think, feel, do and experience in life as a third party observer and start playing with investigative questions.
What a week, it has been jammed packed finalising study, working and finishing a stage that was almost overdue; then bang, the weekend. I didn't have a deadline, or anything that I had to do. I had freedom of choice again, and that got me adrift! What did I end up doing? Going into the office to make sure the project didn't run over time, and came home to clean house, cook a fabulous dinner for 1 and watch two thought provoking movies.
While it was good to have choice, it also felt weird after a few weeks of 'must get this done' urgency and lots of weekend study and late nights. To do added value to life, and self care was a weird feeling. Then, to wake up on Sunday knowing it was Mother's Day and all that it inherently brings up for me. So, Sunday was mixed up, and charged. What WAS I GOING TO DO WITH MYSELF??? As it was I stayed in my PJs till about 1.30, showered and went to the library. With a good dose of pondering questions, a dose of self pity and big dose of wanting to breakthrough the frump that I had found myself in.
Was this a sabotage, or an opportunity. Well, that is the first question isn't it? It depends how we choose to interpret things. For me, the frump was the perfect thing to feel so I could explore the ideas of what I felt I was missing, why and what was I going to do about it??? This is the big one. We all have choices. More so as adults. We choose what we see, focus on and feel about things, people and feelings?
In the library on my quest for considered inspiration, I came across a chapter in a book, its abstract is here....
"The most secure prisons are those we construct for ourselves
When we think about loss of freedom, we seldom focus on the ways in which we voluntarily impose constraints upon our lives. Everything we are afraid to try, all our unfulfilled dreams, constitute a limitation on what we are and could become. Usually it is fear and its close cousin, anxiety, that keep us from doing those things that would make us happy. so much of our lives consists of broken promises to ourselves. the things we long to do - educate ourselves, become successful in our work, fall in love - are goals shared by all. Nor are the means to achieve these things obscure. and yet, we often do not do what is necessary to become the people we want to be. ......
We do not like to think of ourselves as trapped. This is, afterall, the land of opportunity. We are surrounded by images of success. our culture presents us constantly with stories of people who rose from obscurity to fame, often with limited talent. Rather than take hope from these stores, most people absorb them as additional indications of their own inadequacy. We are also confused and put off by the apparent ease with which these transformations occur. the slowness with which productive change actually takes place does not play well in the impatient society. Where do we find the determination and patience required to achieve the things we want?"
Taken from Gordon Livingston Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart (2004)
The message I am endeavouring to put to you, is that if you want something, it is essential to first have an inkling to know what, then act. Nothing new, I know, but think about this:
Change is not easy, real change takes inner reflection, a lot of courage and determination to move in directions which may take you away from your current comfort zone, friends, family or what you know. This is serious stuff, but at the end of the day, it is your life, and your choices.
Start by looking at what you can control - your thoughts, and what you do to your body. Even this can be scary and confronting. You are in charge of what you do, what you put in your body, on your body, and what you think, but you might need help. It is ok not to know, or have confidence to make the changes needed. You might not have the skill of how to fine tune your choices to your body, or to dive into the messages of your body, this is perfectly ok. This is what we have professionals for.
If you want to make change, it is about owning this thought, and then asking for the help to bring it together. It is a smart person who grows into what they want to be and courage to complete the transformation. Is this You? After all, it might only take a few tweaks or insights to shift the linkpin that is keeping you were you are, and if it is as simple as that, why wait for things to get bigger or harder?
Want help, then ask :)
Does this resonate with you? Think about the foods you tend to eat if you are celebrating, or content; Happy or sad; Frustrated or concerned. Do you eat slightly or dramatically different when you are in a good mood, compared to being worried, or down in the dumps.
I will hazard a guess that you, like most of us choose differently and our mood, self belief, our unconscious thoughts, let alone changes in body chemistry due to hormonal shifts, microbiota, medication, nutrient deficiencies seasons etc make huge differences too. Who, or what then is in charge of our food choices?
Studies have been shown that all of the above influences, but have you monitored yourself and compared your go to choices due to emotions? Not many have?
I was listening to a series of podcasts over the weekend and one struck me the most. Not new information, but presented in a way that made me stop what I was doing - assignments, and sit, listen and poinder what she was saying.
Do consider taking 30 minutes out and then some time after to ponder how her message in the past has impacted on your health and life choices. Three simple words, when you allow yourself to hear and take them in can have such a profound change.
You may not appreciate the significance immediately, and that is ok. I will however encourage you to take up the challenge of putting the words on your bathroom mirror, in your phone as a reminder, and anywhere else that you will see them regularly.
Hope you are curious enough to go ahead now :)
Did you watch it? If not, what is stopping you, your unconscious mind knowing what it is going to talk about and already blocking the message? Yes, it is possible for that to happen.
In line with the video is a quote that also resonates.
" Let resentment know that it is no longer welcome as your mind's house guest. Tell your excuses that they must excuse themselves now. Declare that you will no longer be driven by the way you've been living, and don't let the door hit your past on the ass on the way out. " Scott Niolet
The past is the past, the now is the now. Each second we get to choose a different action than we did in the past; a different feeling, and certainly a different way of seeing ourselves. Once you have noted the emotions that trigger food choices, it is possible to be a lot more discerning as to what you put in your fridge, let alone your mouth.
The challenge then becomes do you see yourself to be enough and worth making the choices and changes that are worthy of your best self that you truly are, or do you feel you need to self punish for whatever reason longer than you have to date?
Self punish may seem harsh, but, if
It is ok if you don't grasp what I am saying here, but I do see it often in clients and myself. Food and all its rules become a tool of self harm or deprivation and not a celebration of the abundance of what we have been blessed with. We have accepted the love of food and what it ultimately gives us .... life.
The challenge has been laid down..... are you ready to own your feelings, points of view, rules and listen to the messages your body wants you to hear? Are you read to make a real change and be guided by your body wisdom and not the latest fad or even science for that matter as you are not a test tube, and you are not a lab rat!! You are a unique person who has had your life experiences to date, and your soul or truest self only wants the best for you and to be you. It is as simple as that.
If any of these questions raised more, good. they were meant to. Now, what to do about that? Ask, that is what we are here for, what is it you would like to know. join our private FB group where you can get support and ask questions, for free.
Join our signature, all encompassing mind, body and spirit Food Intolerance Breakthrough program. You are stepped through the changes to make to increase your awareness of your body to get your life back to where you want it to be. www.stepstochange.com.au the details are there.
Sometimes we need to be real to help others.
I had a food reaction this week, one that gave me a significant headache, aching muscles and fatigue that I hadn't had for a while.
I will also preframe this by saying that I had been pushing my body with the trip to Newcastle that was an emotional rollercoaster, a tiring trip and sleeping in the car, and long study days. So, my body was already stressed and running on adrenaline.
As is often the case, when we need to look at our 'stuff' our subconscious seems to know what to do to make it happen oh that much faster. This time, it was my taste buds asking for a coconut chicken curry. Now curry for me is a problem but I was tired, hungry and bored of eating all the 'safe' foods all the time. I wanted some comfort food that was different and warming. Mistake? Maybe. The 2nd night of the dish, is what pushed me over the edge. One night and I could have gotten through it, but not 2, one after the other, and certainly not while tired and stressed!!!!
The upside it made me stop and take stock. When we are in pain, our body needs to rest and allow the body to take over and redirect nutrients, and energy to minimise more damage. Besides, my brain couldn't think much more than the routine steps anyway.
The pain, while in the regular places - liver detox spot, made me get mad enough to look at it this time with different eyes. i wanted, no i needed to understand what it was really about. I needed to know what was hidden in this message that wanted to be shifted. I should reframe this question, but that one is a bit too personal. Let me say matters of the heart, and family was being really pushed and I wanted to understand what and why so I could help improve the outcomes.
This morning, I sat in my morning seat. A chair that is in a corner, next to a big window framed with green leaves. A cosy place that I can look into the home and be grateful. What came up was I needed to forgive myself for my unrealistic expectation as a child for my parents to give me a God Like love. It was unrealistic because humans are not God, and we ALL have issues and hang ups and fears, and limitations that keep us from being our God selves. I also really need to forgive them for being as wounded as they were, it wasn't their fault either. Their upbringing and ife experiences, the culture at the time didn't encourage self awareness, let alone healing.
Coming to the deep, unmet need as a child, and also knowing my past, it made a lot of sense. The pain eased, the head is starting to think again, Tapping has been done, and I am grateful to the teachers along the way that have opened the world to promoting self healing in ways that may not have been in history.
Thank you to each of you too, because I believe you are here because you want change in your lives, whether it is for your body only, or a combination of mind, spirit and body. We are all drawn to what and whom we need to help us at the time, even if we don't see what it is all about at the time.
Im trusting this message may help or give hope to others here, and as I said in the opening statement, by being open, it gives permission for others to be real as well.
Wishing each of us only the best, and smoothest of learning transitions as possible. xx
What is this leading to??
I challenge each of then, as I think I can safely say that those in this group don't acknowledge how great you are. Between been great Mum's, Grandma's, Dad and Gramps, working, or caring for others, how often do you really sit back and look at what you have gone through to date and really, I mean, really see the good, the lessons and the growth you have taken on through the valleys, plateaus and mountain peaks?
Don't underestimate the positive impact each of you have on each other, even if we don't all reach out or share. Group consciousness creates the space of support. Unconscious holding of the space. So please, in the chat lines of the closed Face book group, join us if haven't already done so, and share one thing that do acknowledge that have done. It could be that you got out of bed today and got dressed, or decided to get your hair cut at the dressers, or buy that new winter coat in readiness for the season. You have travelled across the country, or waters to make a difference in any which way. I think you have got the drift. What have you done that when you think about it is pretty impressive and special even if no body else thinks so?
You may have worked out by now that I am totally into how the body works, and how many hidden food sensitivities symptoms looks alike. Being a nutritionist, many of my clients come to me with vague symptoms, or they are at their whits end with 'un-diagnosable' conditions, often being told they need to take anti-depressants because their symptoms are 'in their head' (psychosomatic). Commonly, it is these very clients who often say "I don't have any food sensitivities." My response is usually is: "That you know of!"
Would you know if you have a sensitivity to foods?
Would you recognise any of the symptoms if you were asked? I am going to suspect you wouldn't for 2 simple reasons:
1. You have lived with your body, forever, and any small changes have crept up on you and you are like that frog in hot water.
2. You think ageing is a valid reason to pass the changes you are noticing.
Since you are neither a frog, and age is only a number you are off on both counts.
Yes, the body does change with age, wear and tear etc., however, I will challenge this as being an ideology of the mind, programmed to expectations. Our body changes due to nutritional deficiencies, stress, life stages and other events that drain our nutritional reserves, and contribute to reprogramming our expectations towards the negative. Remember when you were a kid and the world really was your oyster, and you were infallible? That person is still there, hidden under layers of disappointments, nutrient deficiencies, and life stressful events.
What if your body changes are actually a combination of food choices, nutrient deficiencies, and blocked programmes, creating dis-ease and triggering reactions? What if there are possible workable solutions, based on science and scientifically proven ancient wisdom?
If you want to know if you have food sensitivities- check your body against the common symptoms list:
If these sound or feel like you, then get help. Imagine if there were some simple changes possible, but you ignore them and you either got worse, or you didn't have the Quality of Life and freedoms you envisaged, as you matured.
Book in, and start the process now. What do you ave to loose, at the minimum insight, at the most a re-claimed life.
Breakthrough call to see if your level of health is being triggered food sensitivities, deficiencies, and or broken programs.
The mind, is powerful, I am sure not many would disagree with this. It senses, feels, interprets, stores information. We think things through and we dream about the future. What happens though when things don't seem to work in our favor, or we get hit by a left hand curve?
Conflict, difficult times and circumstances are an opportunity to see who and what we are made up of.
The 'shoulds' and attitudes that show up highlights our beliefs we have around the situation, and we are able to determine if we keep, polish or throw out that belief.
Conflict is an internal job, and it is up to ourselves as our body keepers to ensure we are keeping it as clean, safe and honoured as we deserve to be. After all, the body is the Spirit's temple, and if we don't look after it, then the spirit can become tarnished and hidden under the grime and rust of neglect.
At the end of the day, it is all about creating forgiveness for ourselves for how we interpreted the situations as a negative, and seeing the other person't point of view, releasing then from the cause of your interpretation. After all we are all doing the best we can at any moment from our own interpretations and experiences.
"Stress is an inside job, but so is moving past it. The less we focus how stressful we perceive life to be, the less significant stress becomes in our lives. Urgency doesn't always have to feel like an emergency." Scott Niolet
Letting go of stress allows our mind and body to re-sync and come back into balance. Something that many of us may have forgotten over the journey of life to date. It is about being honest with our selves, not sweating the small stuff and talking things through with the people issues relate too. Not always easy but important. As many an older person say.... It really doesn't matter if this or that happened, what matters is the relationships and memories created while given the time to live. If you need help to work through the big issues or uncertainties of life, then get it.
Life is way to short to be held hostage by our childhood, our peers, past and fears.
Sit quietly or even better still complete the wheel of life exercise and write down the things that come to mind. The emotions that rise up, the memories, the wishes and then start to work through them with TAPPING, an easy way to start the shift. IF you want or need more support, be sure to reach out.
Life, is what we make of it, it is the sum of choices over our time alive, and the unconscious acceptance of other people's beliefs and expectations. By now, you may be wondering why I focus so much on the mind stuff, and not giving out lots of food related 'orders' and guides. They will come, but first we need to consider what and why we do the food stuff, without awareness of what and why, nothing really changes in the long term, and we just keep doing what we have always done. Yes, small changes may be made, but from experience, they don't stick around long enough to become habits, (unless they are feeding a feeling)
Think back to the time of the day when you are feeling flat, what do you think of besides sitting down and not thinking?
What food or drink do you go for?
You have had a stressful, hard day at work; at home, what do you 'go for' because
"I need to relax"
"I have had a hard one today and I deserve this."
Are you going for carrots and celery and a big green smoothie? Some how I doubt it but might be heading to the fridge for a cold one, possibly chips or chocolate, or biscuits, possibly take away because it feels to hard. I do this too, believe it or not. Sometimes a day was just tooo hard, toooo long, and tooo stressful and I too awine or two, or maybe a Gin & Tonic. Habits such as these were easy to create and not so easy to give up, even for me.
So, what can be done. There is a process you can do in the heat of the moment, you possibly already do.
Stop! Ask? Choose.
It works better after you have done the awareness exercise, but for now, lets pull this one apart.
When the urge comes to follow a habit or knee jerk reaction, stop.
Take several deep breathes, and ask yourself:
"What is this, what emotion is here?"
"Is it mine, or did someone else give it to me?" "Do I want to continue feeling and responding like this, or not?"
Friday afternoon, in Crete, Greece. The breeze is gentle, the atmosphere is relaxed and light. It is not quite one week in my mid life reset adventure, and it feels like it!! My body has coped a hiding from the travel, and new foods (I can react to several foods, and hyper sensitive to gluten, and cow milk, and spices. Great when travel foods are all these, unless one is lucky).
Few people know my true reasons for leaving the land of the down under where mighty rule the space. No, that is not quite true, it is an illusion, a power I have given to some people I know. It is more about the fact that over the years, I have allowed myself to dwindle away from the determined, independent, yet equally fiercely insecure person I was to a person where the insecure part increased and the independence dwindled. I noticed this early on, but my stigma and beliefs held me in the space of limitation, unhealthy relationships and 'following the rules'.
Over time, the need to re-balance of internal power become true strong. I had exploited my self views and associated with people who easily and willingly mirrored my fears. I knew on a deep level I needed to take back my shadow parts and reclaim my true self - love. It has been a long and painful journey, but one that was needed to live and experience, or die. Yes, that dramatic.
I have spoken with many people over the last couple of months of this journey, I made the decision and booked flights in February this year. The resounding feedback is "WOW, that is so courageous I admire what you are doing. Is this what I thought when I booked, yes and no. The entire trip by design a "where the wind may take me" experience booking only a few days ahead or even on the day. Brave, incredible or down right silly. Possibly all of these things all round into one. I am choosing to see the part of me again that can do anything, make things happen and be ok with the choices being made.
Every second is a choice. "Do I do this or that? " Choosing to not make a choice and allowing others to decide is a choice to hand over one's power to another. Be careful with whom you play this game with, as they may be more adept of looking after their own needs than you are and by default you fall into the ideals of another, and a puppet for them to play with.
I was speaking with a sales consultant for a holiday time share, as one has time for when on holiday, and the guy couldn't get a handle in where to slot me into the spiel, after all I am living most people's dream they are selling. I do, by choice work a few days a week, I have closed shop for three months, when at home I live on the beach and do as I choose more often than not. Was this luck, was it define fault, was it even conscious? I will say, a lot has been choice.
I don't want a lot, and fought for this type of a lifestyle, one that goes against the popular perception of house, car holidays, oh and don't forget the endless happy smiley moments with family and abundance of friends chucked in. It isn't a new argument that social media has a lot to answer to, but one needs to consider where did these popular thoughts actually come from, our parents and the propaganda of our forefathers, media employed to 'sell' the image the companies wanted us to buy into to sell their product. This too is not a new topic and I have spoken of it before, it is after all a rebellion trigger to what I am now doing. See I too got caught up in the ought tos of living, I ought to have a family that totally adore and love me, (I am sure they do, but it is buried in their fear and uncertainty) I ought to have a uber multi-million dollar producing business so I can sit at the beach when I choose, Oh, right I do that now.
It has taken me some time to remember to be true to me. Do I need to be color co-ordinated to leave the house, or cleaning presentable in comfortable clothes? Must I behave a certain way and work 6 days a week, create funnels and tell people they are not doing things right for their health if they are not doing A, B, or even C?
I don't think so. I have left for a three month, reset adventure which in truth started last Thursday. Since, which is only 1 week I have traveled, 1673 km in three days in Australia, then, hoped on the plane for another 15, 180 to arrive at my current location in Crete. Thankfully, I didn't need to drive the entire way, but when considering what it does to our body, one can sit back and just go wow!
What have these revelations got to do with anyone? To be honest, not sure, as we each make our own choices based on our own beliefs and values, my had become blurred and skewed from what was important, so I chose to reclaim and to me at the time seemed the best way to do it. What is yours though is for you to work out. Are you happy and if not why not, what is out of balance, what is it you are OK with to enable the bigger picture of love and life to occur? What changes in your perception, attitude, behavior, habits etc can be altered or tweaked to bring things back in order. Seeking help from a trusted and experienced support person is vital to help see through the fog that we create.
For me, I had moved too far into the forest, with fog so deep not to see easily. As a result I have left the space and things immediately started to change. I am feeling somewhat better in my mind, I have a laissez faire confidence which has opened up conversations with people at home in ways I didn't think was possible. I am finding here while talking with people they are in the same boat, which is somewhat comforting, and it is also prompting me to think one reason why I needed to leave was not to rescue myself, but to help those with whom I talk with as suggested by my counselor as to what might actually happen. So, the question then arises, am I being selfish by doing something i want/needed to do, or have I been called to help others while helping myself? Afterall, in all things the physics of cause and effect happen, and it is possible as each of reclaim more of our true selves not only do we provide the space for others to do the same, by example, but also by default give other the courage to consider another way of doing, of living.
(By the way, I didn't buy into the time share I was being 'sold' to. It worked out I made a good decision all those years ago and have a better deal. Another message this week that I have been and still are on the right path, even if it was covered in mud at the time. :)
"You cannot become who you want to become by only doing what you want to do. Don't do only what you feel like doing. Ambitiously tackle whatever's required to move toward what you aspire to" Scott Niolett
If any or all of this has started you to think, then consider purchasing the Awareness and Accountability Journal I created while undergoing serious transformation. It encapsulate a mirage of ideas and questions created over time to help me gain clarity. It has been used by my clients in a variety of ways, and it may just help you too. Interested? Find out more here. It might help you get where you would rather be :)
It has been two months since I have written post here, and a lot has happened in that time. Following my own suggestions of lofty questions and completing the journal questions, to gain clarity and action a journey started that has snowballed into something totally unexpected, and the courage to do it.
My questions were around abundance, connection with family and friends, and self awareness, these came in spades, one might say. AS the saying goes, what we focus on, we attract and to be honest so many things in my life had come to a crossroad, it was becoming a health hazard. I was stale, tired and disillusioned. Things were feeling like dead-ends, brick walls and not fulfilling. For this reason, my mind really started to wonder towards what if, and what could be different - lofty questions.
The universe kicked in fairly quickly, as the notion to take off on an extended adventure, reset the button so to speak and see what happened. As a result, the following has happened
The Europe trip, 3 months of wondering the groves of the continent starts in a few weeks. Excited and a little nervous, but seeing how supported I have been in preparation reinforces to me, I just need to go and do. I have been able to create the money to pay for the ticket, I have reached out to people there who I haven't spoken to in ages and so re-connecting, The sequence of events leading up to now has been nothing short of synchronicity, in other words perfect, divine timing.
Coming back to the idea of focus. For a long time, there has been an internal struggle around 'what material things are acceptable to have'. For some, possessions, and big things at that seem to be the thing to strive for. The keeping up with the Joneses, and keeping in form according to media, and advertising. This is something I have generally not followed, I can't see the point of spending money to have the latest whatever for the sake of it. If it is needed because there isn't anything else in the house to use, then maybe, but not just because I am told I need it by the TV.
I have been fortunate to live comfortably in a van, drive a car - until it died, I eat well, what I choose, I travel, and do things that interest me. How? I choose to. I am also in the position of not needing to consider others either. I chose to do things my way. Yes, at times I think about what others might think - my kids, my ex are big testers, but the beauty of this reflection is clarity - Do I want to be bigger, more successful, more wealth at the cost of my peace, comfort and sanity. For me the answer is no. I would rather a simple life and contentment, health and emotional wealth than money that drains me.
Living simply philosophy is a good one, if one can do it, otherwise I think it would be too stressful. More so if the choice to do so was to meet another's expectation or trend, which is something I see coming through. Similar to the happiness and gratitude trend. There is a good dose of truth and health in the messages, however, like most fads the message is great until we feel we need to perform only from that space and not be real. It is impossible to always feel and be happy, content, loving and compassionate. Life can suck and big time at that, emotions of hate, anger, rage, and revenge do surface. Are these bad? No they are not, but we are told we are not healthy if we feel them, we are not living the happy way.
The balance side of this is all things are allowed to be, the good, the bad, the ugly, the painful and down right run away and hide feelings, it in how we deal with them that counts. Knee jerk or auto pilot reactions when we take time to consider them and learn from them are powerful teachers. It is then we can make changes in our thought, deeds and actions. If we can take time out and ponder the big emotions that are coming up and allow ourselves to have a conversation with the emotions to learn the lesson they are bringing to our attention then they are helpful, an art of allowance that is beautiful and healing.
For instance, if a person just annoys you, see if they are doing things that you do, but you don't particularly like - the shadow self; If there are obstacles or things just 'not working' triggering frustration or even bulldozer affect are there control issues, or insecurity about not being in control showing up. The deeper one delves into the core issue allows for fascinating realisations. You might need some professional help to take the dive, but it is worth figuring out the triggers so one acts from choice and integrity.
What is any of this got to do with you? Possibly everything or nothing. I am purely sharing to show that others are doing, what maybe you would like to do. That small changes in thoughts, focus and choice can create massive impact of change. In many ways from the living I have done to date, and learnings made has only reinforced the idea that we can only do so much the rest really is up to what our life journey is meant to be. Yes, there is a lot more depth to this statement that I have not, and are not yet ready to share, so if you the reader is willing to take a leap of faith and start considering your life, your choices to date and be honest about what your crossroad choices are and then decide what is important to you. They are your values, desires and acceptances, and no one would take them away form you. Live our life for it is truly only yours.
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.
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