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Come join me on the couch and
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explore ​ways of thinking and feeling. 

Why Bother!?

25/11/2017

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Life, is what we make of it, it is the sum of choices over our time alive, and the unconscious acceptance of other people's beliefs and expectations. By now, you may be wondering why I focus so much on the mind stuff, and not giving out lots of food related 'orders' and guides.  They will come, but first we need to consider what and why we do the food stuff, without awareness of what and why, nothing really changes in the long term, and we just keep doing what we have always done.  Yes, small changes may be made, but from experience, they don't stick around long enough to become habits, (unless they are feeding a feeling)
Think back to the time of the day when you are feeling flat, what do you think of besides sitting down and not thinking? 
What food or drink do you go for?

You have had a stressful, hard day at work; at home, what do you 'go for' because
"I need to relax"
"I have had a hard one today and I deserve this."  

Are you going for carrots and celery and a big green smoothie?  Some how I doubt it but might be heading to the fridge for a cold one, possibly chips or chocolate, or biscuits, possibly take away because it feels to hard.  I do this too, believe it or not.  Sometimes a day was just tooo hard, toooo long, and tooo stressful and I too awine or two, or maybe a Gin & Tonic.  Habits such as these were easy to create and not so easy to give up, even for me. 

So, what can be done.  There is a process you can do in the heat of the moment,  you possibly already do.


Stop!    Ask?   Choose. 


It works better after you have done the awareness exercise, but for now, lets pull this one apart.
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When the urge comes to follow a habit or knee jerk reaction, stop.

Take several deep breathes, and ask yourself:
"What is this, what emotion is here?"
"Is it mine, or did someone else give it to me?" "Do I want to continue feeling and responding like this, or not?"
Now, you have a choice.By asking your deeper self to be part of the reaction and choices,  you will gain incredible insights.  It takes practice, and being prepared for the The Critic to have a voice too. The secret with the critic is to thank it dong its best to protect your ways, and ask it to take a breather while the adult you has a chat with the rest of your voices, and just do that.  Allow the other parts of you to have their say.  You will get some really interesting insights about what you really feel and what you really need. 

I am not for one second suggesting this is the be all or end all, and speaking with trained professionals is essential for moving through the really deep stuff, but for in the moment choices asking if you own the reaction or if has been learnt from someone, or another time gives you choice to own the now and make the choice for now.  Yes, you may still have the cold one, the biscuits, chips etc, however do it and enjoy it. 

The opportunity to choose again is the very next time you put your hand to the food and go to put it in your mouth, and just like a child who pushes the parent for gifts, or attention, when we give them permission they tend not to want it any more.   Give it a go.   

Consider the list of things that need to be done else where - diversion technique. This creates a win-win.  You get things ticked of the to do list, and feel better about that!; You are less likely to indulge in the high energy, low nutritional valued foods. A triple win.  You take control back from the auto pilot and you get to steer the direction of your life for that 15 mins, or depending on the project maybe  another few hours. 

How would you feel to tick off the list, spend time with family or friends and top up the emotional bank account? 
What could it cost if you didn't? 
One last thing.If you are still looking for food ideas, and that is understandable, can I suggest you look at this resource.  It may inspire a food and drink change, for the healthier.  

If you are looking for why food choices are so important, then the Wellness in a Nutshell is the place to go. 
​
If you are still not convinced you have enough of a problem to worry about, and lets be honest, until we get sick we don't, do we? We can extend our health and longevity more if we start making changes now.  Consider where on the scale you are and see if this prompts you a little bit more. 
If you are ready to dive deeper into what, who and why, then consider a Guided Meditation, and explore what is really driving your choices. 
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    Author of 4 books; 
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Leah Marshall-Marmulla Personal Change Agent: Author; NLP Practitioner; Counsellor

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  • Reclaim Yourself - Options
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