Growth happens at the edge of our comfort zone, results in creating a difference either in the way we feel, see things, be or have.
Think about this :)
Children's physical growth pushes the skin, bones, muscles etc to go beyond their current shell.
Mental growth as in learning a new skill and knowledge comes when we learn new things outside our current understanding.
Emotional growth occurs when we step beyond our comfort zone, meet and greet our shadow side of our emotions that are asking to come into the light.
The general consensus of growth is - change, strength, maturing into our fuller potential.
Is it easy? Usually not :(
Most of us need to explore, contemplate, give things a go, practice, hurt, fall over, get things wrong and with time and persistence things start to come to fall into place. The lessons and life start to become second nature.
We become more comfortable with our lanky limbs as our torso catches up after the growth spurt; We apply the new maths, English and formulas from our classes; we become more comfortable with the person we become.
But, what happens when our emotional side is stunted? If we are not able to experience the lessons needed because our role models didn't know better and their emotional growth was also stunted? If we were bullied and so shut down, or fear kept us stuck in the past?
This is where many of us become really stuck. Our body and mind grow, but our emotional growth is stunted, and often parts of our psyche remain stuck in our childhood. The result? Big kids in adult bodies floundering, wanting things to be and feel different, but without teachers or role models to guide the maturation process really not moving forward in healthy ways.
Interestingly, it seems, this emotional growth is the hardest type of growth to accomplish in life. Our society we don't have an emotional curriculum in school or social circles, we don't have initiation services to re-inforce and celebrate a teen's emotional and mental status. Most of us are floundering around hoping for the best. and it is our responsibility to seek out guidance, help and reassurance when we hit our next emotional growth spurt (and there are many during our stages of life. But, in a world with Mental Health stigma, an attitude of 'It will be right mate', or 'Just get on with it, pull up your big girl/boy pants and get over it' really doesn't help.
The tide is turning, thankfully, but, there is a long way to go in creating social change to truly support the three-four generations that are living during this time. The younger ones will be still influenced by Parents, Grandparents, peers, social influences. The Elders may not appreciate the changes, and struggle with the new supports available, more so since their beliefs are about 'Getting on with it, and not being a wuss'.
How can we break the cycles? By supporting as many as possible with deep, energetic change at the belief and DNA level.
The massive impact this has in raising one's self worth, abilities, and raising the bar to healthier emotional levels has far-reaching effects. Yes, it does still result in unsettling moments, but so does civil unrest, family disagreements and the like. Which is a healthier, outcome? Positive change or remaining stuck in the past pains and limiting beliefs?
If you are ready to work through your next emotional growth spurt, and want support, guidance and learn tools to make the process easier, consider the deep and comprehensive work offered at Steps to Change, and book a chat session to see what the healing options available for you. It really could be life changing not only for you but your family, your career and your future.
I will confess, at the beginning fo my life change journey, some 20 years ago, I was a thorn, seeing person. My justification still holds true, I was witness to negative role models with abusive tendencies. Growing up it shaped what I saw, felt and thought was normal.
Fast forward to being married and starting to look around at what happy marriages and adults look like. Reality check :( What I saw in myself and what I desired was a huge chasm, and the beginnings of deep rumblings.
I learnt. I explored. I forced myself to see the dark side
Author of 4 books;