This is was purposefully written to make you think and become a more level headed. We are not more dysfunctional as we think we are, and to help create more self compassion, and more for others too. We are all working towards living and creating more of we want - love and sharing of this!!
Let's put this into perspective.
New experiences that ask of us to learn new skills, and let go of the heavy baggage so we can travel easier, lighter, or more so when we are treading water, that we don't drown under the weight of the past.
It is possible. It starts with a thought, the enquiry, the learning, the healing, letting go and transforming one's self into the character we choose to become. Hopefully, more Love, Grace, Humility, etc.
Let's be honest, we all have dreams, aspirations, wishes etc, if we don't we are living a shell of a life without passion and life.
How to make big things happen, the ideas, dreams, hopes, aspirations that seem just too big to get one's head around. The one's that make your heart race in anticipated excitement or fear because the outcome could be so, so good!
Or maybe the goal for you is
First things - check in the goal or aspiration is actually yours and not to appease another, or to fulfill someone else's expectation otherwise you are going to be working out of alignment with your true self. Misaligned attention is a body and mind stress.
Secondly - describe the outcome in as much detail as possible. Get descriptive, use as many adjectives as possible. Get creative. You might be more comfortable in painting, drawing, doodling making music etc..Anything to help anchor your new reality to your subconscious.
Not sure what the goal could feel like? Watch movies, documentaries etc to help you create a visual/descriptive story to recall at a whim.
Remember, the subconscious really doesn't know the difference between a fantasy or reality, so the more times you can see, feel and anchor the goal, the more the subconscious gets on board to create it.
The side effect to this, while can be painful and challenging at times are huge, massive opportunity blessings. As you change your internal imagery, you also change your vibration and what you send out to the world - things not of similar value, vibration etc will move away. Yes, the opportunity is to heal your attachment to events, people, expectations, limiting beliefs and actions not aligned with your bigger picture.
The best part of this is life does get better, it does become lighter, clearer and more loving as you clear out the heavier beliefs, and emotions from your psyche.
Thirdly - give yourself to gift of clearing out, healing, letting go and transforming your limiting beliefs that have been holding you back all this time.
Most of the beliefs aren't even yours. You took them on at an age (before 7) before you knew enough to consciously assess the situation and make a choice. Your parents, siblings, school, culture, society etc you were exposed to gave you these and through osmosis learning, you took them on. Is it time to review these and heal the ones that really are not serving your goal?
Your self belief and self perception was also generally formed within the first 3 years of life, so again, your feeling less then, unworthy, unloved, not fitting in, not smart enough etc, stem from a time that hurt your feelings, but didn't make sense and you internalised it.
Believe me, we all have done this, we all have hang ups, some learnt bigger, harder, more isolating ideas than others.
Fourth - Learn skills, tricks of the trade, in the moment support techniques to keep the vibe high, the goal front of mind, re-affirming your conviction etc. When we do this often, many times a day, then the goal becomes easier and closer!
So, back to the original question... What is one kick butt goal you would like to achieve and what does it look, feel and be like?
If you are not sure, and are ready to take stock of your current life and learn the why, the how, heal, and grow, then the ReclaimME! Spring Clean Program is the one to start with. Combine With the ReclaimME! Transformation package, and you are one your way to a new life.
Start playing the What If... game. It is quite liberating and freeing.
The full details are in both my What the Mind Sees Book and The Awareness and Accountability Journal. It is also used in all the ReclaimME! programs, it is that powerful!!
Everything starts with a thought, and so we can use this to our advantage to create more of what we want. The steps are simple enough, but the big secret is to heal and let go of the limiting beliefs that stop us from stepping into the dream. How can I say this?
Because it is one of the tools I use all the time to create a different outcome, and besides, all the Gurus in the Mindchange field say the same thing.
It works in the premise of
So, if you don't like what you are seeing in your world, in your life, then you need to change the imagery, beliefs and the life you are living in your head and body. Be the Change You Want To See in the World. We must be it before is can come to pass. Hence the fun of the What If... game.
This is what you do.
1. Sit in a space that you find inspiring, or makes you feel good.
Or, what an inspirational movie, documentary etc where you can witness a win over a difficult situation.
2. Now, consider your life now, and where you really want it to be.
As a child, what were some of your dreams and aspirations etc.
When you look around, what do you see others doing and being and get a feeling or knowing that says "I want to do that too!!"
3. Next is to write out, without filtering all the things you would like to be doing.
Write it out, brainstorm, give yourself permission to brain dump without filter.
4. When you have exhausted the ideas, then allow the reasons why it can't happen, shouldn't happen objections etc. Yes, this is confronting, potentially trigger making, painful etc, but now you get to see with more clarity 'why' you are living your life to the capacity you are now, with the limitations/handbrake on and why it is so challenging to move ahead.
The magic can happen now!!
When we have this awareness, we can literally take our power back.
Yes, it is possible. So many have done it before us, why not you.
If these ideas of possibility excite you, then you are ready to take the next step into your empowered future.
Reach out and book your session to start the ball rolling. You don't have to take the slow road, you have an opportunity for support and steps forward to create more of what you are dreaming about.
Book your session to start the real life changing process. It is possible and now can be your time too.
hen we are going through life's challenges we can feel overwhelmed, and big emotions do come up. Over my time, there have been many deep valley moments, and each time, I needed to learn another deeper core truth about the limiting belief/s that were ready to show up and transform.
There are always silver linings and blessing in all things we do, but the bigger the issue, bigger the potential healing blessing, waiting to be discovered.
My life purpose is to challenge and support people. I don't mean to go out of my way to make people uncomfortable, but when we become uncomfortable or challenged, we have the opportunity for develop clarity and choices.
The one reason why I am so comfortable to challenge people is because I have challenged myself all my life.
See, I was never good enough as a child so I made it my mission to learn how to look after me, and ultimately I needed to learn how to love and accept myself. My journey of learning about my gaps and hurts meant I have explored so many different wounds and at the core point of each was a sense of not being enough. How did this show up?
The silver lining of my experiences is quite simple.
I ask you, what changes would you also like?
How could your life change if you -
Imagine for a moment, or many how your life could be different. Again, some of the experiences myself and clients have come to enjoy are quite profound. We have a stronger mind, love and connection with yourself and also with those love and admire. We have given up the feelings of being invisible, unimportant or even hated and embarrassed our own uniqueness and with this, people treat us differently and with higher regard.
This sounds good, does it not? Secure your spot in the ReclaimME! Spring Clean program and learn about you and where you want to go.
Yes, there is an assumption that all or at least most people find change difficult, but after years of observation, I do think it is an accurate assessment.
Change, unless it is forced upon us with enough pain - loss; significant rug pulling, left field change many of us will not change quickly or easily. This is of interest.
We know and can see how things could be easier, lighter, better if we consciously choose to change, but yet, we hide, stay back, shy away from doing the action required to create the dream we have in our mind's eye.
There are a few reasons, which ones hold true for you?
If you require support or knowledge around change, then there are several ways I can do this.
An interesting question, that cames to me this morning, and while we have previously spoken of habits and rituals, this one asks what do you do to help you come back to yourself, to calm, ground and keep you feeling safe?
For me, I am finding the ritual of making coffee in the morning. The process requires several touchpoints because I use an Italian percolator for the stove. It needs water, ground beans, and then screwing the gadget back together before lighting the fire. I find this, sometimes more than the pleasure of drinking the coffee to be even more powerful.
Another one is cleaning, and when I get to this point I know there are some big things coming up.
Rituals others use include the obvious - exercise, meditation, bathing, gardening, sitting in nature, cooking, etc. But, what are some of yours?
What are your go-to actions that help you come back to a state of neutral?
For some, this may seem ego-centric, to look after our own sanity and be protective of it, but, what happens when we continue to give to others from an empty vessel that is literally being wrung dry?
Not a lot can happen, and we run the risk of cracking under the pressure of being wrung out to get the last drops out of us. Now, is the time to reassess what you need to look after you. To know how to re-centre, recalibrate, to calm your nervous system down again so you can function easier and more completely than not.
Other powerful things that you can do are:
If you want more support or structured activities, ReclaimME! Spring Clean walk you through all the activities and techniques we have explored over the last 12 weeks.
Full of mindfulness exercises that help you to focus on what is really going on for you in the moment so you can identify easier the historic reason of what, how and why you believe, feel and react the way you do. Heal these and life gets easier!!
Recently we celebrated ANZAC day, a very important day in our history. On this day, we celebrate with respect, honor and thanks to those who died in the World Wars. If you haven't experienced the power of such a day first hand, maybe you can imagine it.
We recognise the reasons behind the war - to protect our loved ones from risk, and potential death. On this day we acknowledge the many who literally laid down their life to ensure the safety for others against some of the worst fears.
At the moment, we could equate the current situation to a war against an unknown. At least in the other Wars, we knew exactly which country we engaged with, their philosophies, their principles etc and why they were fighting.
We were able to identify with something but in the current situation war is a lot more insidious, and in many ways an unknown. We can't actually see it, feel it, touch it. We are experiencing the social, economic and health impacts, but, we don't actually see 'it'.
We are required to respond in a very different way. The threat of the virus.
There's a few ways we could explore the situation and relate it to the physical wars of past.
Change, is the movement from where one is now, to where we would like, need or choose to be, but why is it so hard?
It depends on the individual, the reason, and why change is needed. At time, with disease it is important to change. Or if parts of our life are not 'working', then change is needed somewhere to create the parts more in alignment with the desired outcome.
But, and this is a big but! For a person who has not previous experience of what it feels like in the 'new' state, for instance having energy and feeling fit or happy, content relationships, or sense of security or peace and we tell these people it can be quite daunting for them, a fair amount of resistance is given. Why?
That answer if simple - we are asking, expecting or telling them to do, be or have something that is foreign, or scary or if they have previous trauma too confronting to take the steps to create change.
I have witnessed this first hand. In my growth phase and not knowing what it felt like to be content, loved, or secure. When working with people in the justice 'system', listening to their experiences and why they were so cautious about being helped; and recently listening to experiences of domestic violence trauma where now, even sleeping is difficult because the needed to learn hypervigilance to self-protect.
• If change is in our best interest, but we don't understand what it feels like, then there is resistance.
• If we are forced to change as in a disease, then the unknown is scary, confronting, and people are forced to address bigger issues about themselves and what their life habits mean.
• If one chooses to change, but has no idea of how or what to do, and have been previously repressed, then the slow approach may be needed with a lot more support and encouragement.
• Above all, seeing people where they are at. Choosing tools that work in the moment and with the person involved.
• Integrating change from the entry point needed by the individual - nutrition, support therapy or even deep diving into belief change methods.
• If you are looking to make significant changes in our health and wellbeing, then reach out. Options are varied to your need and circumstances and a quick chat can help you identify if I can support you through your next phase.
To book this quick chat, please do so here www.reclaimme.as.me/goodfit
Change, what is it, and how do we create it?
By definition, change to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone (https://www.dictionary.com/browse/change)
All of us, constantly create change. We get up and change from being asleep, laying down etc. We create change when we do anything. Habits create familiar, predictable changes in our state and routine to match what we have agreed to experience in our life. The routine, the known, familiar, expected actions that make up life.
I want to challenge you though.....
Words have a vibrational power to change your world. How?
The thought behind the word changes your body chemistry.
As simple as black and white. For many, each has a different feeling; black dark and heavy, white light and expansive.
Love, Joy, Peace infer a calmness and excitement which raises our vibration.
Sadness, disconnect, loneliness feel and therefore change our body chemistry to denser, heavier and likely depressed/compressed body reactions.
To heal, live life more fully and creatively, lighter, expansive feelings create the space for this to happen.
Your thoughts, create the vibe that goes out into the world, drawing to you experiences that match or a similar.
Now, you have choice. You and entirely you have the ability to control your thoughts. As you become more aware of your thoughts, feelings and action, you are given the gift of conscious change - what do you want to feel, be and have?
How, in the moment to you cut off so to speak and redirect the heavy memories, feelings, fears, etc.
* Thank them for bring your attention to something that wants to be healed.
* Tell the feeling that the adult you does have this under control and you CHOOSE to be in the moment and see, feel and be the positive aspect of the situation - choose the silver lining component, the blessing in disguise etc.
* Breathe deeply refocus in the now. Literally in that second to second moment and consciously see, feel and be the silver lining.
* Step into the positive power this provides. Own it and continue doing what you are doing with conscious, chosen, empowered choices fr feeling, action and response.
It gets easier with practice and yes, if you feel the past has a massive hold over you, support will benefit.
Author of 4 books;