Awareness is the first step to changing anything.
Years of learning different modalities of belief change, because beliefs dictate your thoughts about self, the world view, how you 'see' others to be.
Remember the phase - rose coloured glasses? While in truth, the colour of the lens really is determined by your early life and how you interpreted life to be. So what colour are your lenses? Mine was grey to black, with a good dose of rose in there too.
How to do learn, become aware of new idea? Is it books, podcasts, individual sessions, group sessions, retreats etc. Trust that you will be introduced to the right person for you at the right time.
That being said, if you have read this far, I am going to suggest that I might be your right person in the now to help you work through what is bubbling up now.
To give you a head start, download and complete the self reflection activity, then reach out to clear your glasses to be more in alignment to what you want to be.